Bayonetta is the new gothic Lara Croft, with smaller boobs, there’s no doubt about that whatsoever, the differences however, are that where our Lara is an adventurer, an archaeologist, anthropologist and all-round hot property in her early 30s, Bayonetta is a witch, over 500 years old, she can shape shift, wields a sword better than Dante ever did, handles a gun or two (or four) better than Lara ever could, has the sex appeal of ALL of the Playboy bunnies ever, can twirl around a pole like a pro stripper, has the best innuendos I have heard in a long, long time, can give the devil himself a run for his money in the ass kicking department AND she can do magic, all this while never once letting her cool looking glasses fall off her face.

Plot wise there is some story here and like most Japanese inspired games, it is a bloody complicated one. As the game begins, a flashback shows the player a small piece of the great battles that once took place in the European town of Vigrid between two warrior races, the Umbra Witches, female followers of darkness whose magic was fuelled by the power of the moon and their counterparts, the light worshiping male Lumen Sages whose magic and powers were fuelled by the sun. Each of the two factions shared between them, two treasures known as the Eyes of the World, separately known as (wait for it…) the Left Eye and the Right Eye which were used to oversee the just and true passage of time.

Long story short, the eyes go missing and a war erupts between the Umbra Witches and the Lumen Sages and the cut scene ends. 500 years later and in the present day, a witch, the titular Bayonetta, awakens after 500 years of sleep and finds herself with no idea of her whereabouts or who (or what) she is. She does have an ornate necklace with a small red gem inside it around her neck and she believes this to be the Left Eye and while she searches for the lost Right Eye, she receives flashbacks of things that she believes will help her remember what caused her to be in the position she is now in.

Twenty years later and Bayonetta meets a man named Enzo who informs her of the possible whereabouts of the person who has the Right Eye. Bayonetta then makes her way to the city of Vigrid in order to find this person and hopefully regain all of her lost memories. From here, Bayonetta must deal with secrets about herself, her past and her people, all the while battling angels and worse.

The game difficulty is something I have not seen before in any game other than Devil May Cry. The levels are Very Easy, Easy, Normal, Hard and Non Stop Climax (yes, yes I can see the innuendo from here thanks). If you choose to play the game on Very Easy or Easy, then a special mode is made available to the player called Very Easy Automatic, this mode positions Bayonetta in the correct place to perform attacks on enemies, and the player then only needs to press one button on the controller at certain instructed points unless of course they wish to perform their own choice of movements or attacks. If players find themselves drawn to this mode of play then I strongly advise that you up the stakes a little for your second time around, trying to best your own scores should be enough to boost the replay factor enormously.

Bayonetta is equipped with four guns, two which she carries with her hands and two which she carries with her feet (simian-like but true) and as players progress through the game, they can collect fragments of golden LP records, which when whole, can buy new weapons such as a shotgun, katana and yes… a whip… Players can also unlock transformations through the game which allow Bayonetta to shape shift into various performance enhancing creatures such as a panther and if Bayonetta is injured, sucking a lollipop will heal her. There are also lollipops which will enhance her strength and replenish her magical powers.

Our girl is also very handy with her fists and her feet and you can combine your moves to produce more deadly results, some of Bayonettas more deadly moves turn her hair into giant fists, boots or monsters which rain pain down on those beneath. She can also summon torture equipment such as a guillotine or iron maiden to destroy her enemies. Another nifty little trick is Witch Time, where dodging an enemy at just the right moment, slows time down enough for you to unleash all sorts of beatings on them. Oh, and lets not forget the amazing finishing moves, my favourite of which is where Bayonetta does a sexy little dance, turns her entire outfit into a wolf-like shadow cloud which then bears down and tears apart her victims, though in all probability said victims are more likely caught off guard by their opponents sudden nakedness and are therefore easy prey…

The graphics in the game are amazing, from the scenery which is thick with details and extremely realistic, to the character models. The cut scenes too are tremendous to watch and really help to spice up the game. As for audio, everything fits perfectly into the game and some of my own personal highlights are when Bayonetta gives the camera a little side head turn and comes out with a line like “I’ve got a fever, and the only cure is more dead angels”.

One quibble I do have, is that load times can lag a little at times but this is a small fault that can be easily overlooked, mainly because you are still able to move Bayonetta around on screen and therefore practise your combos if needed.

Verdict:

There have been a lot of comparisons between Bayonetta and Devil May Cry but I think that it stands on its own merits as one of the finest games to be released so far this year, along with Darksiders that is… Two thumbs up from me! Go Lara… Uh I mean Bayonetta!

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